Yesterday
was Mental Health Awareness Day and I’ve been thinking about how the lens in
which we view the world is probably distorted due to life experiences, biology,
genetics, trauma and most importantly UNRESOLVED mental illness.
Recently I
watched the Joker (2019) movie starring Joaquin Phoenix, a brilliant story on mental
health and distorted perceptions. I wonder if those murdering, gun-toting
domestic terrorists might suffer from a similar disposition because they haven’t
been able to unpack their issues--maybe they don’t even perceive those murderous
ideologies as problematic.
In some cases, it seems their perception differed so much from reality and went unchecked because their
loved one’s perceptions of them were also distorted.
It’s
important for us to sometimes look outside of ourselves, acknowledge our biases
to understand how we perceive things and checking in to make sure it’s healthy
and in line with what is actually going on.
I liken a
Distorted Perception and Implicit Bias to be one in the same. According to
researchers, Implicit Bias is the unconscious attribution of particular
qualities to a member of a certain social group. Or also in my definition, the negative
perception of a people because of exposure to stereotypes reinforced by media
and zealous rhetoric.
A Distorted
Perception can be the same: You perceive your neighbor’s dog (and all dogs in
general) to be dangerous because of a dog attack incident in your childhood. You
perceive (your neighbor, a black men) to be dangerous because of a (purse
snatching) incident in your childhood.
It doesn’t mean
however that all perceptions that diverge from reality should be considered incredulous. A
healthy fear of recognizing that a dog still has animal instincts can be
garnered; A healthy awareness of your surroundings and securing your belongings
is OK. But if you let those warped perceptions invite prejudice or negative
actions, you are crossing over a line into a more insidious territory.
You may not
even recognize these issues—hence where regular mental health therapy sessions
can be beneficial. As it was for me in my college years.
Nine years ago,
on Halloween I was raped by a man in a hoodie. EVERY single time I see a black
man in a hoodie--I get triggered. It got so bad that one day I unknowingly treated
a man unfairly. When I mentioned the situation to my therapist she helped me
unpack that bias and I had an epiphany. Through therapy, I’ve learned to
mitigate my bias. My therapist asked me
to monitor my heart rate while people watching at a park. Sure enough, every
man in a hoodie triggered a negative response. I now must counter that
perception with some mental gymnastics and a reality check. Doesn’t mean I’m
not still triggered--it just means I’ve recognized the perception is
problematic and I have to work a little harder to mitigate that.
Don’t think
for one moment that I am trying to devalue your human experience and range of resulting
emotions. Your perception is a real sensation for you, the emotions that result
are real. You should own them, go through the motions and diplomatically speak up
if you feel unsafe or are experiencing injustice.
But also
recognize that if your perception is significantly divergent from reality it
can cause a rift in relationships and your livelihood. For example, you make
numerous complaints to animal control on your neighbor’s dog because he sniffs
your petunias during walks, thusly alienating a potential friendship; Or you call
the police on a black man for barbecuing at the park, thusly being the laughing
stock and memes of social media. (no shade) lol
Perception
is YOUR Reality, here are a few tips to consider from Psychologist, Jim Taylor, PhD in PsychologyToday:
- Don’t assume that your perceptions are reality (just your reality)
- Be respectful of others’ perceptions (they may be right)
- Don’t hold your perceptions too tightly; they may be wrong (admitting it takes courage)
- Recognize the distortions within you that may warp your perceptions (seeing them will better ground your perceptions in reality rather than the other way around)
- Challenge your perceptions (do they hold up under the microscope of reality?)
- Seek out validation from experts and credible others (don’t just ask your friends because they likely have the same perceptions as you)
- Be open to modifying your perceptions if the preponderance of evidence demands it (rigidity of mind is far worse than being wrong)
